What to tell your Allstar Cheerleader after this election.

As parents, we have an incredible responsibility. This past election has taken a toll on many. Our children are watching. They have questions. We as parents have a responsibility to educate our children about the incredible freedoms we enjoy and privileged to have.

The morning after the election people were shocked, saddened, blindsided, overjoyed, validated and scared and paralyzed with fear. Many did not know how to react. Not many saw this coming. No matter where you stood in this election, we did our best to educate our children on the values each of us hold dear to our hearts. Increasingly, those values are vastly different, yet all important. During all of this,lessons were learned.

Many of our children went to bed with an idea of what was going to happen that night. Many woke up with a completely different perspective of how the world just changed. Some feel it is good, some felt is was bad. As we took to social media trying to make sense of everything, people vented, compassion ensued, humility was thrown out the window. Over the top paralyzing posts of hate littered the timelines along with inspiring words of hope and positivity. One question continued to turn up as I thumbed through my feeds.

“What am I supposed to tell my children in the morning?”

No matter where you stand with this past election, I hope we can agree that both candidates were very flawed. We as parents owe it to our children to give them an honest overview of each candidate (if, and only if they ask). With the varying ages, this overview will be filtered to some extent but is should be honest. If not, we are doing a huge disservice to our children who we unwillingly forced into the nasty business of politics at a very young age during this election.

The question kept rolling around in my head. If they asked, what would I tell my daughters? My wife and I were driving back from an appointment. We were stuck in traffic and she was killing time catching up on the latest social media for the week. She had been extremely busy at work and traveling for the week. She continued to stumble upon the same question. She dropped her phone in her lap looked over to me and said. “Why would people struggle for words on what to say to their kids in the morning after this election?” “The only words that matter: “Get your butt up, get your shoes on, and get dressed for school”

That was a very simple response to an extremely complicated issue. It is why I married my wife. She is amazing and incredible role model for my daughters. She has worked extremely hard to compete in a male-dominated field. In all these years, never once has she stated that she did not succeed or was held back because she was a woman. We know the reality of the situation, but she will not let it define her. I felt I needed to expand on the topic and thought of a few more things to tell my children in the morning.

  • NO ONE can hold you back in anything you set your mind to do.
  • Do your best in everything you do.
  • Be the change you want to see in your life and in the world.
  • Seek out positive role models and surround yourself with as many as possible.
  • Model those role models and reach out and love those that have lost their way.
  • Never underestimate anyone and treat everyone with respect.
  • Don’t be afraid to befriend those who are different from you, They will make you a better person.
  • Finally, get your butt to practice, listen to your coaches, be the best teammate possible and continue to do amazing things with your diverse, amazing team. Respect the legacy those before you have created, and make it better.  

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I am not naive enough to think that these simple words will fix all the complexities with this past election. As parents, the only thing we have control of is producing the best children we are capable of. That is in our control. That is how we create the change we all so desperately seek. It’s on us, make the change together by keeping it simple.

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The one thing Allstar Cheerleaders need from their Dad.

The different trials in life are always interesting. As with many families, it typically starts with a few activities. Little Susie or Tommy starts to tinker with a group activity here or there. It may start with soccer, move on to dance, ballet or gymnastics. All fantastic group activities that build lifelong skills. During this time of self-exploration and self-discovery, it is common to dismiss things while your child finds their calling or passion. It is also typical for us dads to lose interest in supporting our young ones as they bounce from activity to activity because they can’t seem to stick to anything. Then it happens… they walk into the Allstar Cheerleading gym.

As I enter my fourth year in an Allstar cheer gym I have seen the complete cycle of dad interaction. During the first year of Allstar Cheerleading,  dads will cautiously approach the building, scan the area, scope out their territory etc. As they gingerly tip toe into what in their mind is a scary place. No matter what team the child is on, the father will ultimately find the furthest, quietest corner in the building and plop a squat. As they begin to scan the room they are desperately seeking another dad.

Upon observation dads normally have this sequence of emotions.

  1. Well, this is not the type of Cheerleading that I imagined.
  2. This is a very disciplined organization.
  3. Why do we spend so much time/ money here?
  4. The coaches are not playing here are they?
  5. HOLY MOLY did you see that? How did they do that? and so on…
  6. Now I see why we spend so much time/money here.

If you are fortunate enough to have Worlds team in your building the mere sight of what that team is doing on the mats will peak a new dad’s interest. Typically, it starts with them shooting up out of their seat and possibly uttering something inappropriate under their breath. Then the first competition starts and things get complicated for dads. I have seen many responses and you can typically place a dad in each one of these buckets.

  1. The overwhelmed dad– This Dad is intimidated by the entire experience. He is not sure how to respond to the competitions, the practice schedule, the intensity level, the overall commitment. He simply does not know where he fits in.
  2. The Dismissive dad– This is not my thing. I am a hardcore Football/ Baseball/ Hockey/ Basketball Dad and Allstar Cheerleading is not my thing but I will go, and duck out quickly.
  3.  The Passive dad-Who is busy being focused on his career and providing for his family. Will listen to the trials and tribulations, but will come to a few competitions if any. Certainly will be supportive but from afar.
  4. The All-In dad– You will find this Dad front and center. Probably knows more about the score sheet and rival teams than he should. Decked out in gym attire and may occasionally over-compensate by wearing a silly costume or make an over the top sign. In the severe cases, has written a book or writes a blog (Ahem..)

I could go on and on about the different types of dads. The Dads listed above are all equally important no-one is any better than the other, and all have a role to help with the success of their son or daughter in this incredible sport. No matter where you fit in the Dad spectrum in Allstar Cheerleading, overwhelmingly there is one thing that I would ask you to give your athlete no matter what age or level.

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The one thing Allstar Cheerleaders need from their dads is a CHANCE. Give them an opportunity to win you over and share their amazing experience. The Allstar Cheerleading community is a very tight-knit group. Once you enter the inner circle, the life lessons you will observe (once you give this sport a chance) will live up to any perceived expectation you could ever dream of. Our sons and daughters only need one thing from us and that is an effort to show genuine interest in their team and passion.

Some dads can be very intimidated by this and that is ok. If you are not sure how this whole thing works, I would ask you to do one simple thing. Take a moment and ask your son and daughter how this whole Allstar Cheerleading thing goes down. I promise, you will not understand what a full-up, a half or a smush is, and that is ok. The mere question you ask will mean so much to them. You will be a hero in their eyes. If you feel more comfortable sharing old war stories when you were a kid and persevered in a sport, even better.

Every minute you spend with them rubs off on them. Every story, every moral, every hug, every kiss, every time you discipline them, every time you make them go to practice when they don’t want to, every time you wipe away their tears, every time you buy them dippin dots at the competition, every time they see you show compassion when things don’t go as planned on the mats– it all rubs off. Your kindness, your wisdom, your examples, your lame jokes. They all rub off. We have some pretty amazing dads in our gym. We like to recruit more.

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Remember, you’re molding a little life here, a very impressionable little mind, and you are your kid’s role model. Their hero. Show them how it’s supposed to be done in your own way. You do not have to be over the top or costume dad. Just give them a chance to show you what they have with their team. You will mess up a lot. (as I certainly have).  As your child grows older, you’ll be amazed at how you two wind up having so much in common both in success and in failure. Why is that? Because he or she is just like his/her dad and you knew enough to give them a chance to include you in their journey.

 

 

The blessings of taking risks and trying new things.

One year ago today, encouraged by some special parents, I released the book trailer to Welcome to Mintland. I remember being so scared and intimidated to share it with everyone. It was important for me to set the tone of what the book was about and the magic I hoped to capture. I still even now agonize about the details of everything. I knew once I released the trailer there was no turning back, the book would have to be released. It was a very scary time for me.
The day I released the trailer. Welcome to Mintland was over 3/4 of the way completed. I had no idea what I was doing or how I would actually get this book published. I still to this day do not know what compelled me to write it. I needed to take a break from writing and decided to create the book trailer (again a first for me). It took me many many hours to get it right in my head and then transferred to video. After I created what I thought captured the essence and tone of the book. I gathered up enough courage to share the video with a trusted friend. After watching the video my friend said nothing, she just covered her mouth and broke down in tears. It was then I knew, the story of this magical team needed to be completed. Her reaction validated my instinct that this team and this story was something that may not happen ever again. The team being so young and naive had no idea what they had accomplished together. Looking back it all just seemed like a blur as everything simply fell into place as it was meant to happen.
As this story ages, it will continue to live on. My hopes are a few kids and parents read the story and are inspired to try new things. Hopefully, the message they take from the book is that if you believe in yourself and others you can accomplish ANYTHING no matter what your age is. Set a goal and go for it. If there is a bump in the road set a bigger goal and go for it! If someone tells you every day that you are special, that you can be the best in world and you dare to believe it, special things will happen.
The Finished Trailer From the Book Welcome to Mintland
For the next few weeks, we are donating all proceeds of sales of the book to the Louisiana Cheerforce GoFundMe Campaign. If you would rather donate straight to the cause in lieu of purchasing the book please do!
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Many of the former Peppermints ask me every day how many books we have sold for the flood victims. As I mentioned earlier, my hope was that the story would live on to build life long memories and create inspiration. I always tell them every little bit helps, but they will never know the devastation that happened. They feel good knowing their little story is helping people and that was the intent, as the spirit of the book will live on through them for many years to come.

Helping the Flood Victims in Louisiana one book at a time.

As we all know, Louisiana has been ravaged by floods as the area was hit with unprecedented rains that exceeded over 25 inches in 48 hours. I’ve seen limited news coverage on this event but was learning the extent of the flooding via social media. As I was scrolling through twitter. I stumbled upon something that hit me directly. One of the local Allstar Cheerleading teams Louisiana Cheerforce located in Baton Rouge posted a gofundme page for all the athletes and parents affected by the flooding. My heart sank as an emotional plea the cheer gym reached out to our cheer community. As I read the gofundme page I wanted to do something to help.

The thought of the families struggling to cope with the devastation of piecing their lives together is unimaginable. We would like to think that the last thing on everyones mind in a tragedy like this would be Allstar cheerleading. To children, unfortunately, that is not the case. Many in the Allstar cheerleading community understand that being with your teammates and friends in your home away from home with your coaches is normalcy.

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That being said,  as I mentioned earlier I wanted to help. What I would like to do is donate ALL REVENUES made from book sales of Welcome to Mintland in the next 30 days to this cause. I wrote this book to make sure the story of childhood dreams and perseverance when faced with adversity, were shared with all. I know that this will not make even the slightest dent in the help needed in Louisiana, but if we can help give a little bit of hope by sharing the amazing story of the 2015 Stingray Allstars Peppermint while raising a few dollars to help flood victims get back to normal. I am all for it! I know the team that was featured in this book would love to know that their story could potentially help others. My hope is to raise funds while inspiring a few people or cheer teams by reading about a Mini Allstar Cheerleading team that achieved their dreams by overcoming challenges in the road. It only seems fitting.

If you are reading this and have a friend who Cheers or know someone who would love to read a fun story about Allstar Cheerleading I would be honored if you share this info with them.

Here is a brief trailer for the book.

If you would like to learn more about the book, or purchase a book for the cause you may do so here : Welcome to Mintland 

 

Remember all proceeds over the next 30 days from book sales will go straight to Louisiana Cheerforce GofundMe page. Hopefully, this will be a Win/Win for all involved.

If you feel compelled to donate directly to the gofundme page you can do so HERE

Thank you for taking the time to read this and we are praying for all victims of Louisiana flooding.

Welcome to Mintland Site Launch

The number one request I’ve had over the past couple of months is how is the team doing, or where are they now?  I have done my best to keep up with the team and sharing stories and updates but unfortunately, the information has been all over the place.

Between the Welcome to Mintland FB page HERE, the Blog (You are currently reading) my YOUTUBE channel and my twitter handle, information was kind of tough to find. I wanted to let everyone know I have finally got around to creating a site where you can access all the information you would like about the team.

I have included some special parts of the season I was not able to share in the book. Including the video I created for the team before they went to Summit . I also included a video of Peppermints final performance together as a team at the Summit finals along with the book trailer explaining Welcome to Mintland. I have also included a ton of pictures that were cut from the book.

Ok i’ll stop rambling you can find the new site HERE. I hope you enjoy!

Why Allstar Cheerleaders are Really Really Weird.

We have all heard it, or better yet we have all been subject to the “side eye”. It comes up frequently this time of year. The time where we as an Allstar Cheerleading community begin to re-emerge into society for last days of school and graduation parties. Old acquaintances and parents from school utter the inevitable words. “Where have you been the last 8 months?”

That is when we proudly go into our “defense mode” and share what we have been doing the last 8 months. It normally follows with a valiant attempt to share how passionate we are about what we do, and it typically fails miserably. Then the judgment follows or at least the pity or typically the statement. “Ohh my goodness, I know so and so who does that and I can’t believe that they do ALL THAT just for Allstar Cheer.” out of being humble and kind we normally respond “I know it is kind of weird huh?”

Let me take a minute to explain how weird “ALL OF THAT” is. In a world where the Millennial generation is vilified for being “entitled” let me explain some of the typical traits you will find in a WEIRD Allstar Cheerleader and their family.

At the graduation party or end of year party, you will find that us WEIRD KIDS will end up in the top third of our class routinely. You will find that we will end up going to fantastic colleges. You will find Facebook timelines full of children winning awards and superlatives for extracurricular achievements. You will find many of the WEIRD traits listed below on a regular. We are not perfect by any stretch of the imagination but we are on the right path in more cases than not. We display many of the items below everyday because it is what we do.

TEAMWORK

We have understood for years that nothing can be accomplished without surrounding ourselves with amazing teammates and wholeheartedly believing in them to help achieve one goal. We are taught from day one to believe in each other and work together. We are some of the most loyal people you will ever meet and if we trust you, we will give you the shirt off our back. We learn to trust in others and have faith because we have no choice.

WORK ETHIC

Our coaches teach us we will never be outworked… ever. That translates off the mats and carries over into school and in every other extracurricular activity we participate in. Not only do we work hard but we strive for absolute perfection and execution in practice and in competition. When we tighten our bow get outta the way. It’s about to go down.

HUMILITY

We are normally very quiet and respectful. While we are extremely competitive we know how to lose. We are graceful in defeat and show encouragement and respect even if the judges did not see it our way in competition or in life. We do make mistakes but will immediately start to improve on them both on the mat and off…..vigilently.

WE WEAR A LOT OF MAKE UP

Just kidding.. we actually hate it. Only on occasion or at competitions. In the odd event where we actually go to a dance or formal, it will be accompanied by our beloved Nike Pros under our dress, and our heels will be chucked in the corner after about 10 minutes of arriving.

WE TRAVEL IN PACKS

True Story. Go ahead and test this, I dare you. The most heated rivals in Allstar cheer will unite and become one in the event that someone tries to bully or make fun of anyone in the sport. Not kidding, do not test this theory. Everyone has each others back. Parents included.

FOCUSED

We sacrifice a ton. All to be the best at what we do. We focus on achieving that next skill for the betterment of the team and for ourselves. Idle time is non-existent and we would rather be in the gym instead of hanging out at Starbucks ( well sometimes). While we strive for perfection on the mat, that also translates into the classroom and everything else we do. Allstar Cheerleaders are trained to be extremely focused because they have to be.

MULTI-TASKERS

Juggling school, practices, tumbling, stunt, and a travel competition schedule is no joke. We often lead our school cheer teams as well. Not to mention we excel in track and field, band, choir the list goes on and on. We become multi-faceted at a very early age and we do it well. We excel in most everything we do.

CLOSERS

While many people have no idea what we do, we know how to prepare for success and execute. We do it for the teammate standing next to us. Later in life that will go a long way in the workforce. When the bright lights and the music begin to blare, we can stand up in front of thousands on that stage and nail that routine. Sometimes it does not go our way and things fall apart. When that happens we never EVER quit. We push through no matter what even under dire circumstances.

Yes, I know in this day and age that all of this is REALLY REALLY weird.  There are so many other traits I could list but I could go on and on. As I mentioned in If you are in Business…. NEVER hire an Allstar Cheerleader. these traits are very hard to find in the workplace. It’s ok, we have learned to embrace our WEIRD lifestyle, but as a wise man once said. “Live like no one else, so later in life, you can live like no one else” Thank you for your unintended judgment and amazement at what our children and coaches do. We are pretty proud of them as well.

 

 

The Only Certainty in Allstar Cheerleading Tryouts.

The start of a new allstar cheerleading season can be a bittersweet moment.It’s a new era, the beginning of an intense and amazing journey. The previous month was filled with intense excitement and the memories that will last a lifetime as you wrapped up your season.

Day 1 begins with indescribable emotions. The teams have been released, hopes have been realized and dreams have been crushed. New parents and athletes will walk through the doors with an intense anxiety to be a part of something that is bigger than the individual. Most do not yet know what that entails, but it will come.

Your cheer family all saw what happened last year. Every single one of us agreed the industry and strategy changed from Level 1 all the way up to the Worlds Teams this past year. It happens every year. We all sat and talked and strategized about what needed to be done as uneducated cheer parents. We were then excited when we heard rumblings from our beloved coaching staff that they were seeing the same things and laid out a plan to address the concerns to make our incredible gym even stronger for this year. Then it happens. Team announcements are made and the reality of those changes hits home. Little Suzie is asked to go to a team in a challenging division or team you never in a million years saw coming. Maybe you did not get the level or age group you wanted. Maybe you are elated that Suzie was asked to go to a higher level team. Maybe your BFF is on a different team. The challenges are endless but the excitement and the disappointments are always there.

After doing this for a few years now, I can promise you one thing. Know that your coaches agonized over every detail to assemble you on that team. Know that every superlative in the book was taken into consideration when you were placed on that team. Know that the skill that you threw everything at trying to accomplish in the final three weeks before tryouts may have been accomplished in January while we spent half our class staring at snapchat or chatting away during class. Maybe in that class, the coach was not as attentive as they should have been. Did you grab their hand and say, “I need you right now cause I really want this?” Maybe the skill is accomplished, but the coaches need a leader who has been there to guide a new team. Maybe you are that person who from day 1 can show the team how these skills need to be done and the coach will lean on you to show the way to set the pace for an amazing season. That is as important (if not more important) than last pass or center flyer. Can you see and remember that person from last year? Can that person be you?

New athletes and parents will look to all of us to create our own culture of success. What your gym has is special. It is important to walk that culture from day 1. Entitlement is not a word in our vocabulary in this sport. You get what you earn. Sometimes there are certainly tough breaks or decisions that do not go our way. We are all a family and we will stick together. We will not think less of Suzie if she is not on the anticipated team. Quite the opposite. We will always rally behind each other and our kids because that is what cheer parents do. We will rally to get our kids to practice on time, we will help the cheer dad who needs help with bows and makeup. We will rally to find the hair tie, or locate the missing uniform or bow 5 minutes before call time. We will hold the child up who is sick and about to go on stage for 2:30 even though they can barely stand and we will catch them after they fall from exhaustion after performing while being sick. We will cry the tears of joy and cry the tears of pain. We will have each others back. We will show up no matter what and we will get through it all together.

The only certainly I know of in Allstar Cheerleading tryouts is this. After starting the new mission, (if you choose to accept it) you will be rewarded with a unique experience  and a lifetime of memories and experiences that will make you an even more incredible human being. Most importantly, you will never in a million years just focus on the feeling you had in May during placements. You will remember your team and your entire cheer family being amazing together. You will work harder, dedicate more than most and sacrifice the indescribable all to be part of something bigger than yourself, and it will be oh so amazing!

Good Luck to everyone this year!