What to tell your Allstar Cheerleader after this election.

As parents, we have an incredible responsibility. This past election has taken a toll on many. Our children are watching. They have questions. We as parents have a responsibility to educate our children about the incredible freedoms we enjoy and privileged to have.

The morning after the election people were shocked, saddened, blindsided, overjoyed, validated and scared and paralyzed with fear. Many did not know how to react. Not many saw this coming. No matter where you stood in this election, we did our best to educate our children on the values each of us hold dear to our hearts. Increasingly, those values are vastly different, yet all important. During all of this,lessons were learned.

Many of our children went to bed with an idea of what was going to happen that night. Many woke up with a completely different perspective of how the world just changed. Some feel it is good, some felt is was bad. As we took to social media trying to make sense of everything, people vented, compassion ensued, humility was thrown out the window. Over the top paralyzing posts of hate littered the timelines along with inspiring words of hope and positivity. One question continued to turn up as I thumbed through my feeds.

“What am I supposed to tell my children in the morning?”

No matter where you stand with this past election, I hope we can agree that both candidates were very flawed. We as parents owe it to our children to give them an honest overview of each candidate (if, and only if they ask). With the varying ages, this overview will be filtered to some extent but is should be honest. If not, we are doing a huge disservice to our children who we unwillingly forced into the nasty business of politics at a very young age during this election.

The question kept rolling around in my head. If they asked, what would I tell my daughters? My wife and I were driving back from an appointment. We were stuck in traffic and she was killing time catching up on the latest social media for the week. She had been extremely busy at work and traveling for the week. She continued to stumble upon the same question. She dropped her phone in her lap looked over to me and said. “Why would people struggle for words on what to say to their kids in the morning after this election?” “The only words that matter: “Get your butt up, get your shoes on, and get dressed for school”

That was a very simple response to an extremely complicated issue. It is why I married my wife. She is amazing and incredible role model for my daughters. She has worked extremely hard to compete in a male-dominated field. In all these years, never once has she stated that she did not succeed or was held back because she was a woman. We know the reality of the situation, but she will not let it define her. I felt I needed to expand on the topic and thought of a few more things to tell my children in the morning.

  • NO ONE can hold you back in anything you set your mind to do.
  • Do your best in everything you do.
  • Be the change you want to see in your life and in the world.
  • Seek out positive role models and surround yourself with as many as possible.
  • Model those role models and reach out and love those that have lost their way.
  • Never underestimate anyone and treat everyone with respect.
  • Don’t be afraid to befriend those who are different from you, They will make you a better person.
  • Finally, get your butt to practice, listen to your coaches, be the best teammate possible and continue to do amazing things with your diverse, amazing team. Respect the legacy those before you have created, and make it better.  

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I am not naive enough to think that these simple words will fix all the complexities with this past election. As parents, the only thing we have control of is producing the best children we are capable of. That is in our control. That is how we create the change we all so desperately seek. It’s on us, make the change together by keeping it simple.

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Realizing there is absolutely no point to Allstar Cheerleading.

You have dedicated most of your childhood to this. You have climbed every rung up the Allstar Cheerleading ladder to master every skill possible. You have done your best to surround yourself with amazing teammates, coaches and a community that supports you in everything you do. You have fought through injury, you have worked through lack of God given talent to master the skills that come easy for others. You have pushed through the mental challenges that tell your body there is no way on earth anyone should be able to do this, but you do it.

You have stared down fear, you perform in front of thousands of people with the bright lights blaring and nowhere to run. You go to practice when you want to quit and feel horrible. You have been the underdog. You have felt the intense pressure of being a National Champion and trying to keep that title. You have felt and pushed through the incredible pressure from being on top of the world, and tried to stay there. Knowing that if you can execute through the intense pressure of everyone gunning for you, it will create the perfect diamond. You have sacrificed parties, dances, Proms, free time, ridicule, all to be the best at what you do with your teammates.

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You respect and admire the coaches that spend the majority of the time demanding excellence and screaming at you to get every ounce of effort and focus out of you. You hate them for it and love them all at the same time.You have been blessed to let your talents shine on that stage and you have reached the pinnacle of your craft. You have earned every right to jump on Twitter, FB, Insta or Snap and scream from the rooftop that you are the absolute best there is, but you don’t, because your parents and coaches have brought you up better than that.

You will reach a breaking point during all of this. After you have done all you can possibly do, there will be a time when you say to yourself, “There is absolutely no point to Allstar Cheerleading.” At about this time, I hope and pray with all my heart that you take a look around. I would also ask you to analyze some things. We know you are young and will make some mistakes, but I would ask you to think twice about your actions. Think about the power of social media. Think about the words you choose and the actions you take. When you hide behind that anonymous Twitter handle and spew hate and tear people down who have risen to the top of their craft. When you try to tear others down because you are tired and worn out from practice, school, other responsibilities. When you are frustrated that others are getting the attention after a tough loss.

While you have been so dialed in focusing on your craft, you may have lost sight of those around you, understandably so. I hope and pray that you notice the little Tiny and Mini that idolizes you. I hope you notice the admiration in their eyes staring up at you. I hope you notice after you complete that last pass. There is a Tiny and a Mini analyzing your every move and only one day hoping to duplicate your skill level. I hope you watch when they perfect that forward roll or cartwheel and they are so overcome with joy they stumble over themselves in excitement giving their coaches huge hugs. I only wish that you could see that after those littles come home from practice and competitions they get right back to work creating new routines using your name and the team you represent. When they practice along side you and go for their water break they are longing for you to say hi or give them a high five because to them, you are their biggest hero. I hope you respect that. Carosblog

We all know you did not ask for this, but suspect somewhere along the line of your success there was someone you looked up to. Someone you admired and wanted to be like. Hopefully, they took you under their wing and gave you an encouraging smile or shout of encouragement. Your legacy means something whether you like it or not. An encouraging smile or taking a moment to watch that little team that is working so hard to be like you can move mountains.

At the end of the day, this is a very small world. You understand the bond and the legacy that Allstar Cheerleading represents better than anyone. You know that when the chips are down and you enter the real world outside of cheer, there is no one else you would rather surround yourself with than people who have went through the same challenges and triumphs as you. That could be the very person who you may or may not have been tearing down on #CheerTwitter.

You may not know it now, but the life lessons and skills you are learning that I have laid out in If you are in business…Never hire an Allstar Cheerleader mean nothing if you tarnish or don’t respect the legacy you leave. It means something…it means a lot. If you are not going to do it for the Tiny or Mini cheerleader I mentioned earlier, I understand. Maybe you won’t even consider it for your parents who have sacrificed an immense amount to give you these life skills, opportunities and experiences in life that you may not even recognize at this stage in your life. I certainly hope and pray that you do it for the person you are staring at in the mirror, because you deserve it, and the people you surround yourself with deserve it as well.

There is a circle of life that is Allstar Cheerleading. The circle will then extend into college or any other life path you choose in life. You will be amazing as you always have been. The learning curve may be longer, but you need to realize you built your craft over the course of many years. Life is the same way. The legacy you leave means everything to the future. Respect the honor of what you do by being the better person now.  Continue to be amazing in everything you do, because that is what you know and that is what you were programmed to do.